Where Does The Time Go...

My little guy is four and will be five in about 2 months. It seems as though he was just a 2 week old new born last month. How is this possible? There are four weeks of 4 year old preschool left for him. I would love to slow time, but since I know that is not possible I will instead spend every moment I can snuggling, reading to, talking to, playing with, teaching, and loving my sweet little boy. I don't want to miss one precious moment. He is the most energetic and lively little person I have ever known. Everyone loves him and he loves everyone. He's funny and smart and loves life. Not much gets by him and I am positive he will not miss out on anything he wants in life.

My older son will be 20 in August. This seems utterly impossible to me that he is no longer a little guy. Again I feel as though he were just a baby yesterday. How do we let the years go by so quickly without realizing the important moments are slipping away when we're not looking. He is a strong, intelligent, funny, and loving human being. I love spending time talking with, and listening to him. He is a gentle soul and always has been a very easy going person. We have always had a close relationship and can talk about anything. He loves his little brother and his little brother idolizes him.

Two boys, fifteen years apart in age...where does the time go...

Eventually...

There are many things on my personal "To Do" list. It is personal because it has nothing to do with my family life, and it is not a matter of life and death if these thing don't happen. Maybe I should treat them as though they are life and death so I would get them all done. I have many big aspirations about many projects. My writing, knitting, quilting, paintings, books to read, clay projects, new artistic skills I would like to try, scrapbooking, tweaking my blog (adding photos to the content), setting up my etsy shop, crafts with my little one, time with friends, etc...as you can see the list goes on and on and...I keep telling myself I will involve my four year old in these activities, and that will allow me to work on them. Ha! That never works, because in order to get to them I feel I "should" do the household chores first, then I can "play". When the chores don't all get done I then feel as if I can't do the fun stuff. It is a never ending cycle! I use to do the things I love when I felt like it, but I have let the "shoulds" invade my psyche. This is a quick and effective way to bring to a screeching halt a persons creativity!

One of the lies I tell myself is, "I suppose if I really wanted to do the things on my list I would JUST DO IT!" I think I do this to try and feel better about not doing what I want. Why as women do we constantly tell ourselves the lie that EVENTUALLY when we have time we will get to it (whatever "it" may be)?! I need to do the fun stuff sometimes or I get very grouchy. Yet, I rarely do the activities I listed, so as you can probably imagine I am and have been very grouchy lately!

So here's what I'm thinking...it would actually benefit my family for me to get to some of the items on my list. Right?! No more grouchy wife and momma. No more telling myself, "When I have time I will ________." No more putting fun last.

Yes, I'm sure I will do this EVENTUALLY...